Baptism Story

            Well, as carefully as we tried to ensure that Ca wouldn't feel scared or confused by her baptism, she was. For many weeks preceding the scheduled Sunday, we chatted with her (and the other three) about what baptism meant, why we were baptizing her, and what the logistics of the ceremony would actually include. We spoke cautiously at first, watching carefully for any sign that she was uncomfortable or confused or not interested. Seeing no problems, we scheduled a date, and as the date approached, continued to talk with her about it. Everything was just fine until about 30 minutes before it was time to leave for church on Sunday morning. Ca pulled me (E) aside and explained that she was scared of being baptized. I did a little internal freak out and then calmly asked what part she found scary - and learned that she was exclusively afraid of being at the front of church and having everyone look at her. (Thank you, Lord, for 13 months of language development!!!)

            We talked about how the Bible is true and it says that God is always with us. We talked about how I (and the whole family) would be with her the whole time. We talked about how the people who would be looking at her were part of her church family and loved her. She was still scared. I was praying for wisdom...we had waited so long to baptize her because we didn't want her to be confused or scared!

            In the early part of the church service, she began asking could we please not baptize her. She was so scared to have everyone looking at her. Of course, at that point, we couldn't reschedule discreetly. So I kept praying in her ear that she would not be afraid and I told her I could carry her. I expected her to hide against my shoulder.

            And then.... we went up front. She held her head up and looked out at her loving church family while B and I took our vows to pray with her and for her, to teach her the doctrines of our faith, and to encourage her to come to her own faith in Jesus. She stood confidently with her hand on the table next to our pastor while he put a handful of water on her. She smiled a little while he prayed and she dried her face with Daddy's bandana.

            As the congregation sang a song afterwards, I leaned over to my sweetie and commented that she didn't seem scared during the baptism. She acknowledged that she hadn't been.  When I pointed out that God had answered our prayers, she shared that she knew that He had been with her, and kept the promise in His word. She connected the dots that the Bible is true and we can trust what God says! I saw the eyes of her heart opened a bit. And I realized God's perfect timing in having us wait until she could really understand what was happening in her baptism.

Baptism

            We are planning to have Ca baptized later this month. In order to work through our own thoughts and hopefully clear up any confusion for the rest of you, we thought we'd explain why we're doing it.

            First of all, why do we baptize any of our kids? We (B&E) believe God commands it. We believe that the Bible calls us, because we are Christians, to participate in this sign of God's covenant with his people. Starting in Genesis 17, when God establishes the covenant sign of circumcision with Abraham, we see throughout the Bible that when God calls people to himself, he gives the believers and their families a physical sign. In the Old Testament, the sign of being God's people is the sign of circumcision. In the New Testament, God uses the sign of water baptism. (A great example of a whole family being baptized because a parent believed can be found in Acts 16.) We baptize our kids because we are God's people and it is an outward sign of the covenant benefits our kids enjoy because we're raising them - teaching them to love and follow God and his word. Our kids are part of God's church and receive some of the blessings of his covenant whether or not they've yet made a profession of faith. The sacrament of baptism proclaims the truth of God's covenant and our commitment to our child.

            When I and Co were babies, they were baptized. Shortly after S was adopted, he was baptized as well. We are having Ca baptized because she is our daughter, and a part of our covenant family - a family that follows God. We are not baptizing her because she has made a profession of faith (she hasn't). We have waited until now because we wanted to make sure that she understood what was happening, and wasn't confused or scared by the ceremony. We have explained to her that the babies she's seen baptized at church were baptized when they joined a family that loves Jesus. She will be baptized because she too has joined a family that loves Jesus. She just joined the family when she was a lot older.

            Some Christian churches only baptize a person once they've made a profession of faith. A believer's baptism ceremony provides an opportunity for a new believer to publicly proclaim the change God has made in their heart. New believers as well as kids who have been raised in the church have an opportunity to make a similar public profession of faith at our church, but water is only involved if they've not been baptized previously. You can pray with us that Ca will soon understand the gospel. Pray that she will see how separated she is from God, how Jesus's death on the cross makes a way for her to be with Him, and the she will experience the joy of trusting solely in His blood to save her.

525,600 minutes...

A year ago we met this astonishing and beautiful girl. She bravely traveled around China with us for two weeks without being able to converse with us, then knowingly boarded a plane that would take her away from everything she ever knew.

Sunday, August 9, 2015 (which was still August 8 in the US...)

What a difference a year makes! We are blessed to call her our daughter.

July 2016

(and sorry if the post title got the song from "Rent" stuck in anyone's head!)

Full Circle

For Ca's 7th birthday (in June), I made her a book about her life - sort of an explanation of life before Fletcherhood, the adoption process, and now home. It's got lots of pictures of her orphanage pals and caregivers, and a taste of some of the miracle of her adoption. We sometimes pull it out at bedtime and stroll through the words and pictures. Most recently, she spent a good bit of time seeking to understand the picture from our Both Hands project. The dialogue as best I remember it went like this:
"All these people knew 'bout me when I in China? They all excited for me come our family?"
"Yes, baby, the people in the picture and many more."
"What they were doing?"
"We were working on Miss Lois's house. See Miss Lois?"
"Uh-huh. And they want help me come home?"
"Pretty amazing, isn't it, sweetie?"

She gets it, y'all. Some of it anyway. She doesn't have a clue how many of you were a part of it, or how it all worked, exactly, but she understands that she was wanted and loved by far more than just our family. And we are overwhelmed with gratitude for your love and support and prayers for her and for our family. Thank you.

The Orphan Whisperer

      Yesterday the lake water was calm. And she was super excited to swim.

      Today is a different story. 15mph winds give some waves.

      "C'mon! It's fun to jump!" The experienced kids say. But the girl who's never seen the ocean is skeptical. It's big and terrifying, and if she goes in alone, she'll falter and experience new trauma.


       Her daddy takes her hand and they let the water kiss their toes together. Giggling and squealing, he teaches the fun side of the potential danger.

       15 minutes later, they're holding hands and jumping when a wave comes. And it hits me: this is how he taught the 'experienced ones' when they were small.

       30 minutes later, and he's an arm's length away, and she's crouching and jumping in the waves. She's down, and he's holding and comforting and reassuring her. She's gained her courage back with some sweet words from her siblings nearby, and she's back in, ready to try again.

        This is how we take an orphan and let her grow into a daughter.

"So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God." - Galatians 4:7

Extra Photos

Our Christmas card holds 3 photos, but here are some extras...

And my favorites of each of the kids...

Fletcher kids are fun together...

And Mama and Daddy make 6.

Every good and perfect gift is from above...

2015 is ending, and Ca's first Christmas is on its way. It's not her first Christmas on earth, but certainly her first Christmas celebrated. And I (E) feel as though advent has slipped away this year. But since the kids were so diligent at sending the cards to so many of you, I thought I should take a moment and just count the gifts we've seen God provide.

I'm thankful...

·       that all 4 of our kids are still entertained by a large cardboard box. Once the shipped gift was removed, they spent the afternoon climbing inside, popping out, coloring the box, pretending to sleep in it, and generally having a good time with it. We thank God for the gift of fun, and for how he is lightening our hearts more frequently.

·       that Co's transition back to public school for 4th grade has had so many positive parts. A sensitive classroom teacher, enthusiastic orchestra and chorus teachers and a nurturing math teacher have all played parts in her experience. We thank God for great teachers.

·       that I's transition to middle school has been nearly stress-free. He has a close-knit group of buddies from elementary school, and is getting to know other 6th graders. He breezes through his classes, loves the extracurricular opportunities, and gets almost all his homework done during study hall. We thank God for His care for I in the midst of very big transitions.

·       that Ca's English is exploding, and her taste buds are adapting to our family's preferences. She now eats vegetables (while proclaiming how big and strong she's getting) and we rarely have to make her a separate ramen noodle soup. That we can see places where she feels loved and beautiful, and where she expects us to take care of her and shower her with loving attention. We thank God for the ways we see our littlest one learning how to be a daughter and a sister.

·       that S works very hard to love his little sister well. In the midst of significant struggles to "share" his parents and become more independent, we have seen him demonstrate some really amazing emotional growth. He has become more self-aware, and has capacity for amazingly selfless and difficult choices. We thank God that Ca is exactly the little sister that He intended for S at exactly this stage in his development.

·       that I (E) am making progress towards using my "free day" time well. I've felt like I've been floundering since October when Ca started school, but am beginning to get a sense of how the time (from 9-3, when the kids are at school) can help me be faithful in my responsibilities and relationships. I feel like I'm growing and am tremendously thankful for God's faithfulness to me personally.

·       That B has steady work to support our family. Work that he's really good at, and that's making an important contribution to the company. That God continues to bless our marriage despite the struggles and exhaustion of parenting. I am blessed to be his wife, and thankful for the love we share.

We wish you all a blessed 2016!